i have started to think about what to give to j for valentine's day. i want to give him something special. we have had a rough couple of months and i am feeling as if i have alot to make up for. so he is getting a good old fashion home made present that is made with lots-o-love. that works out for me too...tight budget + free time = crafty fun! i think i may make him a quilt which means i better get started.

i made some pretty major decisions this weekend, one of which involves going back to school. i am excited and scared at the same time. i have to just do it. i cannot take to much more of having an unfulfilling job and doing nothing about it. i have always wanted to help people in some way and the job i have now really does not involve anything more than answering phones and doing secretarial shit. not the kind of helping that i had in mind.

i have also decided to volunteer my time to the gilda club in my town. i finally realized that my job does not have to be the only thing that i do.

jon and i had the best conversation we have ever had the other night. i still can't believe how great i feel. i now look at him and speak to him and think of him differently. i now look forward for every second we spend together and i am so happy for that.

i have so much on my mind...so much that i have to look forward to. some things i can talk about here and some that i can't get into here.

today is a good day and tomorrow will be too!

written at 3:24 p.m.